Happiness is literally at your fingertips, you just have to let yourself have it. And, ideally, everyone wants to be happy. But not everyone is putting in the work to actually achieve happiness. 

There is work that needs to be done to be happy. You can’t just let life happen to you, you have to decide what will make you happy and go for it. But in order to go for it, you have to be accepting of change. 

In this week’s episode, we talk about why you are the only person that can make you happy. Whether that’s in relationships or at work or in your day-to-day life, the common denominator is you. You are the only person who can give yourself the happiness you’re craving, and this week I’m going to teach you exactly how to give it to yourself. 

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Podcast production for this episode was provided by CCST.

Episode Transcript:

Erika: Hello, hello. Welcome to this week’s episode of Ch*ngona Revolution podcast. This is my first time recording podcasts in about a month because before I went on my Italy trip, which was incredible by the way, um, I bulk recorded. I made sure that I recorded a ton of podcast episodes so that I could be fully present during my time in Italy.

If you follow me on Instagram, then you probably saw some of the Italy trip. And actually this is pretty relevant to today’s Today, I want to talk to you about creating change and what it takes to create change within yourself and in your life. And I had this moment, you know, I do feel like travel is very life changing and transformational because it completely removes you from your environment, especially if you go to a place that has different cultural norms, different expectations of just, you know, like life.

If you go some someplace where people don’t speak the languages that you know, you really do. take yourself out of familiarity and you allow yourself to see things that you wouldn’t have seen if you would always just stay in your country or in your hometown and in your bubble. And it forces you almost to expand the way you think about the world, to expand the way that you do things.

It shows you a different way of life. And it really is. transformational. And every time I go on a trip, especially when I go to Europe, I’m like, I can see myself moving here for a little bit, but I did not want to leave. I was really, really sad. And here’s what I wanted to share about my Italy trip. When I was there, I was there for a little bit over two weeks.

So I want to say I must’ve been a week in. And by then I was able to have basic conversations. And a lot of these are repeated words, right? Like if you’re shopping or if you’re at a restaurant, a lot of the things are a lot of the phrases that you use are repeated. Like, okay, where’s the restroom? Can we get the check please?

Like all of these different basic phrases. So between knowing Spanish and it being somewhat similar to Italian, but also, um, practicing on Duolingo at this point, as of today, I’m at a hundred days. Italian on Duolingo. So I’ve been practicing Italian for a hundred days straight and also just being surrounded by the language because we were in Southern Italy.

So it wasn’t like being in Rome or in Florence where it was very touristy. Most people did not speak English and maybe they understood a little bit of it, but I had this moment about a week or a week and a half in that where my language, ability, my ability to speak, but my ability to comprehend had gotten pretty good.

I mean, I could understand about 80 percent of what people were saying, which is pretty, it’s, it’s a lot. And I could say very basic things back. So I could say like, yes or no. And then if I didn’t know how to say something, I would look it up on Google translate. And I could at least print, like I knew the pronunciation at this point.

And it got me thinking like, wow, if I stayed here for two months or two years. Like if it was two years, I would be fluent. And it just gave me this moment of real, this realization, this epiphany that I had that our lives can change so quickly. They can change, right? And sometimes we get so stuck in the same thing over and over and over.

When we can change our lives in an instant, like changes so freaking quickly. Possible for us. I think about my friend Tania. I don’t know if you all remember when I, well, if you’ve been following this podcast for a while, a couple of years ago. So a couple of Junes ago, um, I wanna say it was June of 2022.

I spent a month in Lisbon, Portugal, and when I was there, my friend Tania was there and we went to the beach. And there was two guys next to us and she was like, Oh my gosh, that guy’s really cute. And I was like, girl, give it some time. We are two girls at the beach and they are two guys for sure. They’re going to end up talking to us.

And sure enough, they did. They were like, Hey, can you watch her stuff? We’re going to go get in the water. And we were like, yep, of course. So we watched their stuff and then they came back and then they offered us wine at the time I did drink. So we accepted the wine. And next thing we know, like we are just hanging out at the beach.

The sun has set of just having like Great conversations and Tanya ended up marrying the guy that she met on the beach and her life changed. Like she was on um, a, let’s see what’s it called, she was on a, in a traveling group. And she was going to then go to a different country. I don’t remember what country it was.

And she was already thinking about not going to the next country and either just extending her stay in Lisbon, Portugal, or going back home. And ultimately, she decided to stay. But little did she know that this This, you know, friendship was going to turn into a relationship. And then months after her fiance and now they are married and she lives in Lisbon, Portugal, and she is fluent in Portuguese.

He is fluent in English. When they met, they literally communicated through Google Translate. How awesome is that? Right? So I’m, I’m sharing this story because change is possible and it can happen so quickly if you are open to it. Just like I can learn a third language and I’m already showing so much progress.

You can create change in your life. So whatever it is that If that is not working or if you just feel like you’re stuck in a cycle of doing the same thing over and over, the first point that I want to make in today’s episode, and I wrote nothing down, this is like literally just coming from my brain and my heart and almost just kind of like channeling out, but the first thing I want you to know is that it is possible and that you are not stuck where you are.

You are not a tree that has roots that, you know, can’t be easily moved. You have the ability to walk away from anything that’s not serving you, you have the ability to walk away from the things that aren’t exciting, and you have the ability to go after the things that you want, no matter your age, no matter your experience, no matter your past, like none of that actually matters.

I have friends who were lawyers for years and started creative careers and pivoted. Right. So it’s not just about like relationships. It can be about career. It could be, um, you know, like creating content, right? A lot of people are like, Oh, I didn’t, you know, start on TikTok whenever everything, whenever, um, everyone was blowing up at the beginning of the pandemic.

But I know so many creators who started way after I did and already have way more followers. So it’s never too late. It doesn’t matter what the past is, but this realization, let me come back to my point that I had while I was in Italy. It’s that change is possible and there’s so many possibilities of what can happen in your life, in your career, in your business.

The options are limitless. All right. So now to the actual podcast episode that I planned to talk about. I wanted to talk about how when we want to create change, sometimes we try to create the change outside of us. And stick with me here. So a lot of times we will look to maybe, um, we’re looking for our manager or our workplace to be different in order for us to feel better.

We think, oh, if only like this would change at work, then I would be happy here or maybe we look to our partner like, okay, well, I just need them to do this and then I’m going to be happy or I need my circumstance to change and then I’m going to be happy or I only have 100 in my bank account. Whenever I have 100, 000 in my bank account, then I’m going to be happy and we’re looking for change outside of us to make the inside feel different.

And the formula is wrong and reversed. That’s not going to work because have you ever been in a situation where you have a job and you’re just complaining about the job and you get a new job and then the same thing comes up and then you get a new job and then again the same thing comes up, right? And it’s like, what is the common denominator there?

The common denominator is you. Same thing with relationships. How many of us don’t end up manifesting a similar partner, right? With similar qualities over and over and over. And we end up having similar issues. And then again, what is the common denominator? Yourself. And if you’re okay, saying like, okay, well, I’m going to feel happy once I have the 100, 000, I guarantee you the moment you’ll have 100, 000.

And you’re like, well, I’m actually going to feel happy whenever I have 150, 000 or 200, 000. And the, it just keeps moving. So. What I’m suggesting is that the formula for change happens within and it starts with you. Yes, maybe you are in a job that isn’t for you. Maybe you are in a relationship that isn’t for you.

And I’m not saying that it’s all just you and like to gaslight you and you have to stay and put up with things. Like no, please know your worth. Walk away from the things that aren’t serving you. Walk away from anything that feels toxic. However, you cannot control other people. You cannot control work environments.

But you can control the way that you show up in them. So if you want to change your life or create change, it has to start with you. Not with your partner, not with your work, not until your circumstances change. And here’s why. Okay, I didn’t realize that this episode was going to get so deep, but here’s why.

that we put out and the, the beliefs that we have influence how it is that we act. And those actions then influence our reality, right? Like every action has a reaction. There is, it’s cause and effect. So if your cause Into the world, into the universe, comes from your belief system, comes from how you’re viewing a situation.

The cause is going to result in an effect. So, instead of working on changing the result, you have to change the cause. The cause instead of the effect. I know that we got real deep real quick here. I didn’t expect it to go this way, but this is what’s coming out. So I am sticking with it. Let me try to give you some examples because I feel like examples make it a little bit easier.

If you have 50 in your bank account and you’re just focused on the 50 in your bank account, and you’re making that mean that you don’t have any money, that you are doomed for, that you’re going to end up with nothing, you know, without a place to live, that you’re going to end up without this. And you’re so focused on like, I just have to hurry up and get money.

Well, let’s say that your beliefs are that you’re bad with money. you’re never going to get it. It’s, there’s just like not enough to go around. Well, that’s the cause. Right. And then the effect or the result. And if you’re one of my clients, just imagine the self coaching model, right? So the circumstance is you have 50 in your bank account.

Your thought about it becomes I’m broke. I don’t have enough money. I’m never going to get more and then you feel crappy, right? Because you And then the way you feel influences how it is that you act. And if you’re feeling crappy, then that’s not motivation to go figure out how to make more money. So the result is you’re going to keep not attracting money.

So what I’m saying for this specific example is instead of focusing on Oh my gosh, I have to go, go get more money. How can you look at the 50? I was like, okay, cool. I have 50 and that’s going to help me figure it out, right? I have a 50 runway and I still have money in that account. So this gives me some time to figure out what I’m going to do.

So again, same circumstance, let’s say I have 50 in the bank account and maybe your thought about it becomes, I’m so grateful for the 50 I do have, I know that I’m worthy of having more, something like that. Right? Well then you start feeling a little bit more hopeful and whenever you’re feeling more hopeful, then you’re going to be a little bit more creative.

You’re going to figure out what you’re going to do. You will maybe, um, I don’t know, start selling fruit on the street. If you find a fruit tree or something like that, you can get a little bit more creative. Maybe you are in more of emotional capacity to ask a family member or a friend to support you during this time, or maybe you end up like going to go apply for a job and landing, landing a job.

Maybe you apply for 50 jobs because you suddenly have a little bit more hope and energy. And then that results in In getting more income, but do you see how we weren’t just focused on the actual result? We were more focused on the cause and that’s kind of what i’m telling you with how we create change the change starts within Us not by trying to control everything outside of us So the first thing that we need to do is look in the mirror and ask like, okay Well, what role am I playing if I feel stuck in a situation if I don’t like my current circumstances You Because by focusing on what you don’t like about it, you’re just going to keep creating more of what you don’t like according to the law of attraction.

If this podcast is resonating with you, then I invite you to my newest webinar happening on Monday, July 29th at five o’clock pacific time Four proven steps to reinvent yourself in just 90 days. This is for you if you know that you’re ready for a change in your life.

Maybe you feel stuck and you know that something needs to change, even if you don’t know what that change is just yet. It’s also for you if you are ready to reinvent yourself. Whether this means building confidence, maybe you want to start creating content, maybe you want to start or grow a business, or maybe you want to pivot your career.

It’s also for you if your dreams, or whatever goals you have, currently live in your head, and maybe your journal, But you’re ready to make them a reality. You’re ready to make them something that others can see outside of you, right? Not just living in your brain, not just living in your journal, or maybe you’ve been putting everybody else’s needs before your own and you’re really ready to work on you.

Especially because we are officially halfway through the year at this point. So in this webinar, you are going to learn why it is that you feel stuck and why it is that you resist change. 

You’re going to learn how to go from thinking about your goals and dreams to actually starting, whether it is a dream project of yours or a business, you’re going to learn how to go from thinking about it to actually starting it. You’re also going to learn how it’s possible to completely reinvent yourself in less than 90 days.

And I’m going to be sharing the four step framework and my strategies that have supported me and hundreds of clients in embracing change and executing projects successfully. I mean, we are talking launching podcasts. Just dating after never having dated before, dating after a divorce, advocating for themselves at work, transitioning to a different new career, pivoting from one industry to the other.

I mean, the projects that my clients have worked on are incredible. Anything it is that you want to do that you’ve held yourself back from come to this webinar. We’re going to go over those projects. four proven steps to reinvent yourself. And I’m super excited because at the end of the webinar, we are going to be opening the doors for Courage Driven Latina.

So if you’ve had your eyes on Courage Driven Latina, now is the time to join. So make sure that you register for the webinar because there will be a bonus. So I don’t want you to miss the bonus, but if you’re not familiar with Courage Driven Latina, it is my transformational 12 month group coaching program that’s going to help you gain clarity, confidence, community.

It helps you execute a courage project in 90 days and connects you with a like minded group. Minded community of badass women

and there will be a special 48 hour bonus for all of you who attend the webinar. So be sure to register by using the link down below 

 Again, this is happening on Monday, July 29th at 5 p. m. Pacific time. I cannot wait to see you at four proven steps to reinvent yourself in just 90 days.

to quickly recap the points that I’ve made thus far. The first one is that change is totally possible and it’s possible for you and it can actually happen really quickly. really quick. And there are so many different versions of reality that can exist for you.

But sometimes we get so stuck in the current reality that we are in right now that we fail to see that. And sometimes that’s what travel, that’s why travel is so life changing. And whenever you speak to somebody who’s traveled so much, they tend to be open minded, not because they’re smarter, not because they’re better, simply because they have seen more realities and more ways of life and more ways of doing things, that they aren’t rejecting them, right?

It’s no longer, you know how the brain likes familiarity? Well, they’ve familiarized themselves with more ways of doing things, more ways of life, more ways of viewing, yeah, more ways of viewing life. I don’t even know what point I was trying to make there. All right. And then the second point that I made was about if you want to create change, it starts with Not with your job, not with your partner, not with your child, right?

It’s about how you are approaching the situation. And I think a lot of us have probably gone through something where maybe we’ve been trying to point out that we want somebody to do something different. And whenever we stop focusing on them and just like start focusing on ourselves, a lot of times things work out, right?

Like, so. Let’s say I’ve had, obviously I don’t have any kids, right? But I’ve had friends who’ve nagged at their kids over and over to do certain things. And then finally was like, you know what? I’m not going to keep nagging them. I’m just going to not do it for them so that they can see what it’s like when they don’t do it.

And then suddenly the kids were motivated to do it. Right. But it wasn’t that they forced them or made them do it. They had to be okay with like, okay, this thing is not going to be done. Let’s just say it’s like, I don’t know, okay. Laundry or something, right? Like maybe you’re trying to incentivize your kids.

Maybe they’re old enough to do laundry and they’re not doing laundry and you keep doing the laundry for them and you’re just complaining and mad. Well, what if you just stopped doing their laundry and they just like no longer had clean clothes and then like, Oh my gosh, then they’re going to freak out and be like, then they’re going to get it right.

Then they’re going to do it. So that’s kind of what we mean about changing you rather than trying to force other people to change. Or maybe, you know, you’re, you’re trying to get your partner to do something and you’re super reactive whenever they don’t do it. And then you end up working on changing yourself and really just make it irrelevant, right?

With like, okay, why do I really need them to do that? Or can I give that to myself? Is that something I can do for myself? And pretty much what we’re getting at here is taking a lot of responsibility because you are the only person that you have control over their thoughts and their actions. Not other people.

Just you. So anything you want to do that inspires change in your life.

And I’m sure you’ve all had these experiences, almost like if you’re in a relationship and you keep asking for something and they don’t give it to you, and then you just check out and you’re like, you know what? Okay, whatever. It’s fine. Like, and then they’re suddenly trying to do everything. I think. A lot of my clients have been, have been in that situation or like whenever you’re trying to leave a job and you keep asking, actually one of my clients, we literally just talked about this last week on Tuesday, we were talking about how she’s been advocating for herself really heavily at work and a lot of times things were dismissed and then finally some things were, were actually done, but then she decided for herself, you know what, like this actually does not serve me.

I don’t want to be here anymore. And she gave her notice and of course it turned into this whole thing and then it was like, what do you need? Do you need more money? Do you need more, more support? You know, what else do you need? Are you sure this is something you want to do? And you know, we, we fail to recognize how much power we have in situations until we’re like ready to walk away from them.

But that started with a shift within her, not her changing her outside circumstances. So, I hope this is resonating with you. One, change is possible, and two, change starts with you, whatever it is that you want to do. And I am having a webinar all about how to reinvent yourself, and that is happening at the end of the month.

So it’s happening on July 29th at 5 p. m., that’s a Monday. So mark your calendar. Save your spot. Make sure that you register by going to the link down below, but the exact webinar is for proven steps to reinvent yourself in just 90 days. And you know that this is for you if one, this podcast resonated with you, but you also know if this is for you, if you know that you’re ready for a change.

Even if you don’t know what the change is, if you’re like, I just feel stuck in my life right now and something needs to change, join us for the webinar. Next, if you are ready to reinvent yourself, if you want to either build confidence, if you want to maybe start creating content, maybe you want to start or grow a business or maybe a pivot in your career, whether this is advocating for yourself at work, applying for a different position, maybe just shifting the industry that you’re working in.

Any of that, this would be a great, great webinar for you. It’s also for you if you have found that this like vision you have for yourself or the dreams that you have for yourself, it lives in your head and in your journal, but nobody could physically see it. So what do I mean by this? Maybe you have been doing a bunch of research.

You’ve been trying to figure out like how this can work, but nothing’s actually done. It just lives in your head and ideas or in your journal as, as ideas, but it can’t actually be seen outside of you. Or if you’ve been putting everybody else’s needs before your own and you’re really ready to work on you.

A lot of my clients that end up joining Courage Driven Latina are new moms and they’ve really be, they’ve really lost their identity. And I don’t know, I don’t want to say lost their identity. They have. Transformed their identity since becoming mothers, and they are in the middle of reinventing this new version of themselves, which is motherhood, but also everything else, right?

Like, not just being mothers, but so much more. So if you feel like you’ve been putting everybody else’s needs before you, this is totally for you. And what I’m going to teach you inside this webinar is, you’re going to learn why it is that you feel stuck, and why it is that you resist being stuck. You’re also going to go from thinking about your dream project or business, right?

Like whatever idea you have for yourself to learning how to actually start it, like how to get it out of your head, out of your journal and into reality. You’re also going to learn how it is that it’s possible for you to reinvent yourself in less than 90 days. I’m going to be sharing four different strategies that are proven that Um, I have worked for my clients and then, uh, actually I already talked about this last point that I had written down, which is the four step framework.

Again, the four strategies that have supported me and hundreds of clients in embracing change and executing a project successfully, whether that is literally a confidence project or a content creation project or a business project. I am very excited about this webinar. It’s completely free, so be sure to share it with your amigas.

Again, it’s happening on July 29th. It’s a Monday. at 5 p. m pacific time. So be sure to go down below if you would like to register and I cannot wait to see you there. And I will see you next week. Hasta luego.